The relationship between country and children, can often be shaken by fights or emotional distancing, especially when there is a separation from the couple and the separation of father and son. However, it is possible to make peace with parents, as long as there is good will and interest on both sides.
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According to Joshua Coleman, an expert in reconciliations, the first step in a reconciliation can be the writing of a letter or email from the father to the estranged son.
However, it is necessary to be aware of certain obstacles that may hinder reconciliation between parents and children who have been separated for a long time. Below, see some obstacles for both parties to be aware of at the time of rapprochement.
Detachment is the result of a long process
It may be that parents and children have gone ten years or more without talking. In this way, it is necessary to keep in mind that distancing is usually painful, because it involves many attempts at dialogue, with frustrations and negative feelings.
When parents insist that respect is the same as lack of critical opinion
Perhaps your parents have muted their opinions over time, based on an idea of respect that demands silence and a lack of critical opinion. Thus, the relationship can be strained when there is no discussion about what is right or wrong, without questioning the reason for decisions. Therefore, it may be that in an authoritarian relationship, parents do not understand that respect must be earned.
Parental commitment in building a family narrative
Many parents tell stories about family relationships that are not true. Therefore, there is no space to tell a contrary version, after all, it will undo the impression created by these people about how good parents they are.
Adult child's need for recognition or an apology
Many parents do not take responsibility for their actions, so an apology is often accompanied by unreasonable justifications for the behavior. Thus, lines like “I had to be hard on you, because life is hard too” or “nobody is perfect and everyone makes mistakes” are not uncommon to be said.
In these cases, children just want their parents to recognize how they treated them. If the situation gets too tight, seeking psychological support is essential.